Is it pathetic to let sexuality define whom you are? Does the question imply that sexuality alone is the sole definition of your identity? Or those whom use the lone factor of sexuality to define their identity are pathetic? Alternatively, is it that if one uses sexuality as a factor that defines whom they are, indicate how pathetic one is? The question itself can be read in numerous ways, and so it would be difficult to answer them generally. What should be considered is whether sexuality actually defines who you are. Does sexuality define you entirely?
So sometimes i just click on friends of friends on Facebook, just to see whether i can dig up anything interesting. In general, Facebook statuses don’t offer much debatable topics, but more of statements that express your daily doings; reminiscent of a diary. It’s not very arguable when all you can debate is….whether someone is a dumb ass bitch or not…actually i could do it all day! =)
By chance, i came across a friend of a friend, whom posted their answer/opinion to a rather absurd question: Do you think its pathetic for someone to let their sexuality define them?
[Keeping some level of confidentiality] Their answer truly sparked up some interest and thinking, as to how someone should define themselves. Quoting part of their answer: My sexuality got me bullied, my sexuality made me dance, my sexuality made me fall in love, my sexuality made me find the people I cherish in my life.
First of all, why is there such an urge for definition? If we use the music industry as an example, the reason for individuality and definition is to stand out amongst the millions of artists [past and present], and as a result, aim to succeed through your uniqueness. Returning to a daily life, why do we want individuality and definition? Is it because of how the internet has arguably generalised everyone, and resultantly individuals don’t want to be associated with “mainstream” people? Or is it because we value our ego so much, that we believe we are all different, and thus must separate ourselves amongst one another, to prove how indifferent and better we are? The above questions cannot be answered in the affirmative, yet neither should they be in the negative. Each individual has their own history; thoughts; morals; beliefs; and any other factor which contributes to defining them. Ego, & the internet generalisation, are just one of the many factors that play a role as to how someone is defined. The urge to define, objectively, may be seen as a method of dreaming and paving our future. By defining ourselves, we would be able to construct a seemingly possible reality of our future, and how we can achieve such desires. Contrastingly, without a clear definition of who we are presently, how is it possible to predict or construct our future selves? Another way of understanding the urge to define, is humanity seeking guidance. What we have become today, is a result of how we lived; defined; and dreamt in the past. Using our history, we are able to guide ourselves into a “better” future. The definition of “better” will undoubtedly fluctuate, in accordance with the current political and standards of society. “Better“, personally, is the result of whom we were, and how we tried to learn from our faults and develop an improved future, where past mistakes are kept to a minimum.
Now, the question. Does sexuality define you entirely? Referring to the above, it is only reasonable to assume that sexuality is only one of the many factors that defines an individual. Honestly, if it were the sole consideration, then there would only be three types of people: straight, homosexual, and bisexual. “Tri-sexual”, as i often quote, is not applicable. Modern society seems to have placed such an emphasis on sexuality, that many people consider it to be the sole, or if not, primary consideration as to whom a person is. Yes, sexuality possibly branches off into one’s personal beliefs; morals; values; etc. What seems to be forgotten is that other factors, despite arguably being influenced by one’s sexuality, exist and define an individual as well. Some may then argue that sexuality is the seed, and that all other factors are just the roots; i.e. branching off from one factor, and as a result the entire process of defining one’s self is actually via sexuality. However, why is sexuality the beginning? Is it that one cannot define themselves without beginning with sexuality? It would be absurd to believe that there is any bar on which one factor an individual is to base their identity off of. Instead, what seems to be correct, is that many people begin building their identity through a series of factors; multiple seeds that lead on to extensive branching out.
Back to the original question, is it pathetic to allow sexuality to define who you are? If this question was asked any more simpler, then i don’t believe it would have been answerable. Why is it pathetic for one to use sexuality to define whom they are? What basis and ground is this question asking? More importantly, what does it mean by pathetic? Oh, and doesn’t the entire world use sexuality to define whom they are; i.e. everyone considers themselves as straight, homosexual, or bisexual. Does that mean everyone is pathetic? Or is that… the question was asked too simplistically? Really, the original question has no real necessity and value. What we should question, is how we should define ourselves, and how can we improve on our future?